Prior to my annual Fourth of July Jubilee, my guests and I compile a list of stuff they need to bring to the event. You might be saying to yourself, “Self, what kind of hostess tells her guests what to bring?”

This kind of hostess.

Besides, we also compile a list of food they want to eat as well as soft drinks they want to drink. Then, I go to the store(s) and purchase said stuff.

For example, this year I bought four kinds of chips. For another example, until this year I’ve been serving steak. I also serve shrimp. Just in case my great-nephew (emphasis on great) decided not to eat – it’s always touch and go – I bought a box of banana popsicles, aka his favorite food, so he wouldn’t go hungry.

So, I can be forgiven if I ask them to bring, for other examples, coffee and onions. (By the way, I also don’t eat ketchup, buy I hoard ketchup packets from restaurants so my guests can slather the condiment on their burgers and dogs.)

Anyway, as we studied the list, my youngest niece asked about buns. You know, for hot dogs and hamburgers. I glared at her and explained that I had already purchased both kinds of buns. When my oldest sister – not her mom – came into the room, I shared the list with her. After perusing the list, she asked about the buns.

What’s with these people and buns!

They think I can be trusted to buy hot dog wieners and hamburger patties but trusting me to buy buns is just too much.

On the subject of buns … whilst in the bun aisle, I once again asked myself a question that has plagued people for decades. No. It’s not if a hot dog is a sandwich. I care not about that. It’s why are there 10 wieners in a pack but only eight hot dog buns in a pack? Shouldn’t those two things match?

I looked to the Internets for an answer and here’s what I found. According to the National Hot Dog Sausage Council (NHDSC), “Sandwich rolls, or hot dog buns, most often come eight to the pack because the buns are baked in clusters of four in pans designed to hold eight rolls.”

If they’re not going to change the pans, then why don’t they start selling wieners in packs of eight, you might ask. Because a standard hot dog wiener weighs 1.6 ounces. I’m not a mathematician, but even I can multiply 1.6 ounces by 10 and get 16 ounces aka one pound. Selling stuff by a pound makes sense.

Regardless, there might be an end to this bun-wiener mismatched pack national nightmare. Heinz has started the Heinz Hot Dog Pact to bring hot dog companies and bun companies together to agree on one number to rule them all. Wonder Bread has already started producing hot dog buns in packs of 10.

Perhaps Heinz can start a pact to get my family to trust me to buy those buns.

This post originally appeared in the Appalachian News-Express.

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