As you might remember, last month I wrote about my obsession with my Fitbit, Esmerelda (or Esme for short). I detailed my dedication to checking my steps, heart rate and sleep and to logging my water and food intake. I also speculated that Esme might not continue to hold my attention.

Although my obsession has waned a bit, I’m happy to report that I still jump up and walk when she reminds me that I need to move. In fact, I’ve annoyed family, friends and coworkers by walking during meetings and visits. I’ve also annoyed them by sending screenshots of workouts, but only when I reach and maintain my peak heart rate for a significant amount of time.

During our time together, I’ve become familiar with Esme’s idiosyncrasies. For example, sometimes she doesn’t track my steps. But sometimes she tracks inactivity as steps, so I guess we’re even.

Anyway, when I set up my goals, I requested that she automatically recognize certain activities such as walking and aerobics. From the start, she tracked my walks and gave me credit for those exercises.

Yet, in spite of the fact that I do aerobics four times a week, Esme did not automatically recognize those workouts for what they were. She, instead, tracked them as walks. She did track my steps taken, so in an uncharacteristic move, I didn’t worry about the misunderstanding. So, imagine my surprise when she notified me Friday that she had auto recognized my aerobic workout.

She seemed proud of herself, so I didn’t ask what had taken so long. Instead, I checked to see if I had reached my peak heart rate (I had) and said to myself, “Self, better late than never.”

That brings me to Sunday. When I opened my app to log my water intake that afternoon, I saw a notification from Esme. Ever helpful, she was letting me know she had auto recognized my outdoor bike ride.

I do not own an outdoor bike. I have not ridden an outdoor bike in approximately 20 years. I do own an inside bike, but I hadn’t been on it Sunday. Indeed, at that point in the day, I hadn’t exercised at all.

So, what activity did she incorrectly identify? What was I doing that she misinterpreted as riding a bike?

Making a cake.

I told you she was weird.

This post originally appeared in the Appalachian News-Express.

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