Netflix’s steep price hike and changes to its subscription plans triggered an avalanche of anger directed toward the media giant.

But I’m the person everyone should be mad at.

This is clearly my fault because I was fixing to sign up for Netflix. And, once again, life took the opportunity to bitch slap me.

As you sit there nodding your head in agreement, you might be asking yourself, “You mean she’s not already a member of the Netflix nation? And she calls herself a movie fan.”

Believe it or not, but I have not required Netflix’s services. I’ve made due with renting movies from video stores or recording them off the classic movie channels. Oh, and did I mention the premium channel previews? I look forward to the free movie channel weekends the way most people look forward to vacation. Thanks to those free weekends and the classic movie channels, I had more than 30 movies saved on the DVR as recently as May.

But I always nurtured the dream of Netflix. The thought of finding a movie in the mailbox – a movie Netflix sent especially for me – left me a little dizzy.

Then, folks started talking about live streaming. The realization I could watch movies or TV shows through the Internet, but on my TV, left me a little more than dizzy.

There was a slight problem. You need a computer a wee bit younger than mine or a device such as an Xbox on which to watch the live streaming selections.

With my Netflix dreams dashed, I looked to my family for support.

“You don’t have to have an Xbox,” the nieces reassured me.

My cheeks flushed and my heart rate increased, “You don’t?” asked I.

“No, you can use a PlayStation or a Wii,” they said without so much as a whisper of sarcasm.

“Girls,” asked I, “when did I become a gamer?”

Seriously, do they think I sit around playing “Call of Duty” and training for “Halo” tournaments? I could barely play “Ms. Pac-Man” on the Atari.

That’s when a friend told me about Roku, a non-gaming and much less inexpensive device on which you can watch live streaming.

I researched this device. I even picked out one for purchase.

I also budgeted for the monthly Netflix fee. In case I’ve never mentioned it, I’m somewhat thrifty, so I had to make cuts. I downgraded my satellite TV service to save five bucks. As for the other seven or so bucks, well, do I really need to eat every Wednesday?

Everything was planned. As soon as I watched the handful of remaining movies on my DVR, Netflix and I would be joined in holy movie matrimony.

You know the rest of the story. Oh, I’ll probably still sign up for the DVD package, but I can’t afford the DVD and the live streaming packages. I would have to quit eating on Wednesdays and Saturdays for that.

I guess Netflix just couldn’t keep the packages together and at a price I could manage. They couldn’t allow me that little taste of bliss. I’m sorry the rest of you have to pay for my unhappiness.

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